“EIGHT MINUTES! THEY’RE GOING TO BE HERE IN EIGHT MINUTES AND WE’RE NOT DONE, WE’RE GOING TO FAIL-”
“For God’s sake Kriti, would you please calm down? I can’t get anything done with you squawking like a bat in my ears.” I said exasperatedly, rushing around the kitchen trying to look like I knew what I was doing.
In case you missed the memo, I had absolutely no idea what I was doing.
“Man, Jaya, I told you it was too much for us! We could’ve ordered something and pretended we made it - it’s just their anniversary, it’s not like the President is coming to dine with us.” I stopped my mindless rush to fix a glare at my elder brother, Adi.
“I was counting on all of our help. I didn’t think I would be the one working while you two either complained or screeched my ears off.” Adi looked slightly ashamed, and Kriti had at least graciously stopped her screeching for a minute.
“If by working you mean running around like a headless chicken, then yes,” Kriti muttered.
“Kriti, could you be serious for five minutes?”
Kriti seemed to ponder this question, until she said, “Well, my record is four, but I guess I could try.”
At the same time, Adi moved forward, pulling his shirtsleeves up. “How can we help?”
I narrowed my eyes and Kriti until she lowered her head abashedly and came to help.
“I need to put the cupcakes in the oven - no Adi, don’t touch the batter or I’ll cut up your teddy bear - and the pasta sauce is on the stove-”
The pasta sauce is on the stove. I jumped up, back into action in the battlefield that was the kitchen and deftly picked up a spoon to stir the sauce. It had taken on a gluey consistency, which I was almost certain wasn’t supposed to happen...or was it? I moved to grab the cookbook that was open on the slab, and thank heavens I did. It seemed the gods had been tugging on my strings to move away because just then, the sauce blew up. There was no other word for it - the sauce spat up, painting the walls as if it were a set of some gruesome horror movie.
My mouth was agape, and I could feel the tinge of tears waiting to come rushing down. “So...I guess we can’t scrape the sauce off the walls?” Adi offered, trying to lighten the mood.
“No, but we can use the readymade pasta sauce.” Kriti opened a cupboard and sifted around before grasping a can and bringing it out. I didn’t think my mouth could fall open further, but I guess today was full of surprises.
“We had pasta sauce? And you knew? Why in the name of all that is holy didn’t you tell me?” I shrieked, even though my heart was glad that our plan wasn’t a complete failure- yet.
Kriti gave an insolent shrug. “You didn’t ask.” My fingers itched with the urge to either kick or hug her - but I simply grabbed the can and went about straining the pasta.
“Adi, Kriti, could you start putting the batter in the baking tray? I’ve already added the cupcake liners.” I saw them nod and move purposefully towards the assigned dessert section from the corner of my eye. Treacherously, stupidly, my hopes rose again...until the pasta was strained and it limply fell on the plate.
“That’s it? I could eat that in two bites!” I cried out, drawing furtive glances from my siblings who by now knew better than to deter me from this mission. Instead, they seemed content to follow my instructions and watch everything go up in flames. What was I even thinking? I wanted to make their anniversary special, but nope, fate just wasn’t smiling down on me.
“Kriti, put the tray in the oven, won’t you? I’ll clean up here.” I glanced back at them, watching as she carefully picked up the tray, a corner of her tongue poking out in concentration.
Dinggggg dongggg!
“They’re here! Should I distract them? I’m going to distract them, Adi hold the tray!” Squawking Kriti was back, and she passed the tray back until it collided with the slab.
Then she let it go. Batter flew up in splotches, covering the whole kitchen, and landed on us. We heard our parents walk in from the hallway, and the three of us shared one last glance. The chaos of the kitchen seemed to mock us and our spectacular failure.
“Hey, we’re home-” The utter shock on their faces was what tipped the scales, and I started laughing like I’d truly lost my mind.
Mom bit her lip to keep her giggles in. “Well...good thing we bought pizza on the way home.”
Comments